Alright, so I decided that I'm going to Egypt in May. I'm very well aware that my entire last post was mostly about how I absolutely was not going but I'm going. It's kinda crazy, one of my friends is leading the trip and I told him no five times but he wouldn't take no for an answer. We had three massive conversations about faith and unbelief and I ended up deciding to go. I'm excited but of course I'm scared too.
This whole crazy situation has taught me so much:
1. I don't believe God will provide for me - the biggest reason I had ruled Egypt out was because it requires me to have to raise support. I hate raising support so much because I don't trust God.
2. I don't know how to just be friends with guys- another big reason I didn't want to go is because there are a few attractive guys going and I hate getting caught up in one-sided love so...its just easier to just hang with girls. My mindset has been - you're my boyfriend or you're nothing, and as a result I've fallen into putting the "husband hat" (as a good friend of mine would say) on every attractive guy I meet. I come looking to see what I can get instead of coming to see what I can give. When intead I need to be committed to loving my brothers in Christ without looking for some kind of payback.
This is simple stuff but it has been pretty revolutionary for me in the past few weeks. And its been cool because I've had to confess alot of sin lately and I've felt so much love from the body of Christ. Thank God for brothers and sisters who are not afraid to push me.
I'm excited about going to Egypt because:
1. pyramids
2. I'm not in charge of the trip or responsible for anything or anyone
3. meeting Egyptians and finding out what their culture is like
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Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully around hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements... But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers of love is Hell. --C.S. Lewis
2 comments:
RJ...the Egyptians will love you...just be sure to walk like one...do you get it? That is pure humor! love you!
it amazes me that YOU, Renee, have the same approach to boys that i have... "i don't know what you want from this, so i'll just avoid you." Girls ARE easier. But, boys are good too. Thanks for pointing this out to me.
~Amy P.
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